The “I’ll be happy when”-syndrome can lead to a lifetime of unhappiness.
Did you know that only 10% of our happiness depends on our circumstances?
Isn’t that a crazy low number?
This means a whopping 90% of your happiness has nothing to do with your situation or other people.
How is that for a shocker?
I’ll be happy when… Your happiness is your responsibility
This proves that your happiness is an inside job.
This may not come as a surprise to you, but it means that it’s time to appreciate the good things in your life now.
The good news is that you can be happy now and beat this syndrome.
No more, I’ll be happy when I:
- lose the weight
- have my dream job
- make a lot of money
- feel confident
- have the freedom I want
- find true love
- …
This checklist is endless.
Whatever you’re waiting for, don’t let it define your happiness.
It’s all about your attitude and your actions.
A more positive attitude brings you a more positive life. Check out these great tips for a happy mind, happy life!
I’ll be happy when… and confirmation bias
There’s this sneaky thing called confirmation bias that really messes with you.
This means that your brain is constantly hunting for evidence of what you believe.
You think that you’re not a people person or that others don’t like you?
Your brain will only register the situations where people are mean to you.
If people are nice, your brain will ignore this. Or it will think “Yeah right, but this was an exception”.
So if you think about negative stuff, your brain will hunt for proof that you are right. And that will make you feel even worse.
It’s a vicious cycle.
We are so used to negative thoughts that we don’t even realize how much better we could feel.
And the I’ll be happy when syndrome makes you postpone your happiness indefinitely.
You must know this: You are supposed to be happy. You are supposed to feel good.
Become aware of unhelpful thoughts. Then try to think about something more positive.
Your happiness lies in your hands.
Never allow waiting to become a habit
You don’t know what the future holds and how much time you have left. It’s a gloomy thought, but it’s true.
And even if you’ll live a long life, don’t waste your time waiting around.
Just like “I’ll be happy when” you can get stuck in “I’ll do it when” syndrome.
The only problem with this is that you’ll never do it.
- “Now is not a great time”
- “I’ll start next month”
- “I’ll do it as soon as I’ve learned all I need to know”
- “I’m gonna move in 4 months, I better start after that”
- “I just don’t feel ready…”
Don’t spend your whole life waiting. Whatever you want to do, do it now!
Getting into action mode increases your happiness. You’ll be proud of yourself for getting things done.
So stop postponing your happiness.
It doesn’t matter who you used to be
If you’re not ready to be happy because of who you think you are…
Let go of your past self – if it is holding you back.
Don’t argue for your limitations.
Don’t get stuck in how things used to be.
And your “past self” can even be who you were yesterday.
You don’t have to wait for an arbitrary result to be happy.
You can be happy right here, right now.
Don’t keep telling yourself your old story.
It truly doesn’t matter how things were or what you did before.
Don’t hold yourself back with stories that aren’t even relevant anymore.
And don’t listen to the people who also keep telling you the same old story of you.
They got stuck with an outdated version of you.
Let go of the old you
Focus on what you want now.
Focus on what you need to do every day to become the person who can reach your goals.
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It’s a process, and you get a little better every time you put in the effort…
Until you reach your goals.
How to beat the I’ll be happy when syndrome
It may seem counterintuitive, but you can be happy at any time.
This means you can be happy on your way to your goals.
You are the only one who decided that you can’t possibly be happy before you reached your goals.
But you can.
Every day, look for the good things that you don’t really pay attention to.
Think about the things you enjoy and appreciate.
Maybe the sky is really beautiful today. Or you love your coffee.
It could be the stranger who was super nice to you.
Or you finished an important task and are super proud of yourself.
Really try to think about three things every day that you are happy about.
And if you find more, that’s even better.
It can be big things or small things, it doesn’t matter.
Remember the confirmation bias? Use it to look for reasons to be happy.
Again, only 10% of your happiness actually depends on outside circumstances.
The rest is entirely up to you!
Isn’t that exciting?
So to beat the ” I’ll be happy when” syndrome, you only have to choose to be happy now. Just watch how much better your life will get every day.
Regards,
Improve yourself. Improve your life!
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